Fearing god

In my experience, Christians don't usually talk that much about fearing god. Probably because any Christian talking to me is trying to convert me, they usually emphasize big sky daddy's eternal love. I'd say the fear is much more understandable. If I believed in the petty, mean, jealous, violent and destructive god of the bible, I'd be scared of him. After all, he's demonstrated that he is happy to wipe almost everyone off the face of the earth on a whim, massacre untold numbers of people, let the Devil tormet people to win a bet, and he is apparentlly going to personally cast me into a fiery pit for enternity if I do (or maybe even think) anything he doesn't like. If I believed in him, I'd be scared to breathe.

And yet, Christians go on and on about how they love god and how much god loves them. They insist they have this "personal relationship" that is mutually loving, but at the same time, they are scared of doing anything that might incur his displeasure.

You know what this reminds me of? An abusive relationship. This is how a battered wife feels.

She's scared of her husband. She walks on eggshells around him, hoping not to set him off, but she never knows exactly what might cause him to fly off the handle. Even the most trivial perceived slight might trigger a beating.

And yet, she stays with him. She will insist that she loves him and that he loves her. He's a good man, she'll insist. He only beats me because he loves me - he punishes me when I'm not good enough. It's justice. It's my fault for not meeting his standards, for not pleasing him.

This isn't really love. You can't beat someone you love. He may need her or want her, but he doesn't love her. And she doesn't love him either. Love isn't based on fear. She needs someone and is afraid that if she leaves him she'll be alone, she won't have anyone to belong to.