Wedding rigmarole

My sister is getting married next March, and I am already sick of this whole damn wedding thing. I can't believe what an enormous, expensive rigmarole it is.

Did you know that there are special wedding chair covers you can get? They are special white wedding fabric and can have special coloured wedding ribbons to go with them?

But even worse, you have to match the ribbons to the bridesmaids dresses, and the brides flowers, and the groomsmens sashes, and the table centrepiece, and the cake icing, and the edging on the place cards, and the invitation envelopes .. and on and bloody on. And if your chairs don't fit the special chair covers, there are places that will hire you the proper chairs. Because we all know that unless you have the proper chair covers at the wedding the marriage is just doomed! DOOMED, I tell you.

Why don't people see that the marriage is what's important, not the bloody wedding. I may one day get married, but really hope I don't ever want a wedding.

Anyway, I'm just really profoundly grateful my sister didn't want me as a bridesmaid shudders.