tag | funny59 posts

Bad instructions

|1 min

Can you remember when you didn't know how to install a PCI card in a computer?

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“We are sorry that our president is an idiot”

|1 min

Funny message in a clothing label.

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Technical Documentation Weirdness

|1 min

Warning! Do not view these while drinking anything. Doing so may cause you to snort liquid all over your keyboard and monitor.

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Disappointed by your banana?

|1 min

The solution to all your problems is BananaGuard. Look at these great features:

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Security Exception and a case of perfect timing

|2 min

My students had their mid-semester test last night. It was a practical programming test, held in the computer labs from 6:30pm - 8:30pm.

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I love Mr. Cranky

|1 min

Mr. Cranky has the best movie reviews on the web. Movies are rated from one bomb (almost tolerable) to four bombs (as good as a poke in the eye with a sharp stick). For the really crappy movies, there's dynamite (so godawful that it ruptured the very fabric of space and time with the sheer overpowering force of its mediocrity) and a nuke (proof that Jesus died in vain).

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Bash quotes

|2 min

I was doing a little procrastinating by reading the quotes on bash.org today (I blame Marshmallow :-p). I'm sure most of you have read them at some time or other, but here are some of my favourites.

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Can you find America on a world map?

|2 min

National Geographic does a series of surveys of 18-24 year olds in America to test their geographical knowledge. I don't think any of us would be shocked to learn that its pretty abysmal.

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More bash quotes

|2 min

I killed a little more time browsing through random bash quotes, and couldn't resist posting a few more of the funniest ones.

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The Daily Show

|1 min
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Quoth the server, “404″

|1 min

I've been browsing 404 pages lately:

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More student antics

|1 min

A student writes this on the discussion forum today:

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Avast me hearties!

|1 min

Ahoy there!

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Top Gear set a caravan on fire

|1 min

The Top Gear team decide to find out what makes caravans attractive, and set off on a caravan holiday together. The clip below is just the fire. You can also watch the whole episode.

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Ig Nobel Prize

|2 min

The Annual Ig Nobel Prize was created to recognize discoveries and achievements "that cannot, or should not, be reproduced."

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Pigasus Awards

|1 min

The Pigasus Awards are given by James Randi for paranormal phenomena. There are four categories:

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Uri Geller bends a spoon

|1 min

Watch the trick that made him famous:

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Uri Geller gets performance anxiety

|1 min

Strange how Uri's powers don't work when he doesn't arrange the setting and supply the props.

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Uri Geller parody

|1 min

Hugh Laurie is just so talented.

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American Patriotic Posters

|1 min

These are just some of the patriotic posters brought to you by whitehouse.org.

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Fundies say the darndest things

|3 min
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Christian Programming

|1 min

-- In Visual Basic by JohnNotTheBaptist

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George Carlin on Religion

|1 min

George Carlin is awesome!

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Good juicy tongue in the back passage

|1 min

Fry and Laurie are hilarious!

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Talking to God

|1 min

I've been killing a little time talking to God. Well, iGod to be specific. It's very entertaining. Here are some snippets of my conversations.

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Kicking Ass - it’s the American way

|1 min

Fry and Laurie goodness

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Just write to your MP

|1 min

Just write to your MP ..... but this is much more entertaining ... and sexier . God, I love British comedy.

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English cream

|1 min

More Fry & Laurie

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Fry & Laurie - The lovely Stephen Fry

|1 min

Stephen Fry is lovely, in a fluffy, moist and very pink kind of way.

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Charlie Brooker’s Screenwipe

|1 min

I discovered this program recently on YouTube. Charlie Brooker is a misanthropic British guy who makes a TV program all about television. I find this kind of British humour really refreshing, but that could just be because I like swearing.

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Fry & Laurie - Censored

|1 min

Is is wrong of me to wish I could see Stephen hit Hugh sexily with a golf club?

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Fry & Laurie - My Dear Boy

|1 min

No cocktail tonight - but this clip from A Bit of Fry & Laurie does feature a cocktail.

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Fry & Laurie - My Ass

|1 min

Fry and Laurie take the piss out of yanks.

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Fry & Laurie - Mr Burmie

|1 min

Hugh Laurie's reactions just kill me

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Fry & Laurie - Some Information Please

|1 min

That information is restricted!

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Whiskey Thunder

|1 min

A Bit of Fry & Laurie Season 3 Episode 1 Closing Sketch

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A slow snog with a distant relative

|1 min

A Bit of Fry & Laurie Season 3 Episode 2 Closing Sketch

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Everything in the till and no sudden moves

|1 min

A Bit of Fry & Laurie Season 3 Episode 3 Closing Sketch

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A mug of Horlicks

|1 min

A Bit of Fry & Laurie Season 3 Episode 4 Closing Sketch

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Beef Goulash

|1 min

A Bit of Fry & Laurie Season 3 Episode 5 Closing Sketch

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Berliner Credit Sequence

|1 min

A Bit of Fry & Laurie Season 3 Episode 6 Closing Sketch

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Dick in a Box

|1 min

I know it's ridiculous, but I really really like this. I keep playing it over and over and over. I think maybe I'm addicted to dick in a box :(

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Uncle Jay Explains the Blogosphere

|1 min

Funny!

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Gay Scientists isolate Christian Gene

|1 min

I know, I know, I post way too many YouTube clips. But this one is really short and very funny.

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Graphing Songs

|1 min

Today the Herald posted the below graph of Rick Astley's Never Gonna Give You Up and challenged readers to represent a pop song as a graph.

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Character plus ... a leaking conservatory

|1 min

I've been keeping an eye on properties I might like to buy. One of my saves searches brought me a house in Kelston with the caption "Heaps of potential -character plus".

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Selling houses

|1 min

Since I've been living at home, I've had access to Sky. Mostly, I've been watching the Living Channel & Food TV, with a little bit of CI & Discovery thrown in. One common Living Channel style program is to help out someone who is trying to sell a house but hasn't been able to.

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My next project? I think not

|2 min

The house pictures I posted yesterday showed a house that was very cluttered and a bit untidy, but otherwise clean and in apparently a good state of repair. It's not how I'd present a house if I wanted someone to fork over $300k+ but hey, it's not too bad. By contrast, this listing that arrived in my email this morning is a shocker.

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Warning, presentation won't impress!

|1 min

Seriously, this was the headline under which this house was first listed on Trademe. Not exactly a headline to interest potential buyers. I guess at least they were honest:

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Sup noobs

|1 min

One of the tasks my students have to do during their first assignment is to start a new thread on our discussion forum. There are no rules, they can post about anything.

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Buy this house ... it has a lawn and a fence

|1 min

Most people who list their houses for sale try to put up a range of photos to show the house. Trademe listings allow up to 20 photos. Those with enough savvy try to show off the best features. Most of the rest at least try to show all the main rooms and outside areas. This West Harbour house apparently has "three bedroom, separate lounge, dining, good sized kitchen, garage and sleepout". I guess we'll have to take their word for it, because they only put two photos on their listing.

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This isn't quite how I remember Rainbow ...

|1 min

Rainbow was a kids TV program that ran during the 70s and 80s. It featured Geoffrey, Bungle, Zippy and George and a few random others. It certainly wasn't my favourite program, but I must've watched a fair bit of it over the years.

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How filthy is your mind?

|1 min

This ad for Sky's Fresh TV channel is full of innuendo. How many do you recognise?

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Sex education

|1 min

It's my blog, and I'll post my favourite youtube videos if I want to :p At least, I will when I'm too busy to actually write anything more interesting.

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Scott Adams quotations

|2 min

Scott Adams is the guy who writes the Dilbert cartoons. He also has a very entertaining (and sometimes thought-provoking) blog and has written some very funny and interesting books (which I'll write about some other time). This is just a random collection of some of his soundbites that I enjoy the most:

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2008 Ig Nobel Awards

|1 min

The 2008 Ig Nobel Awards have been announced. These awards are given to research "that cannot, or should not, be reproduced." Some of my favourites from previous years include research into curing hiccups through "digital rectal massage", research into the brain activity of a locust watching Star Wars, testing whether we swim slower in syrup or water, and an investigation into the validity of the 5 second rule for food dropped on the floor.

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Procrastination Guide

|1 min

I know you are all in awe of my mad procrastination skillz (go on, admit it!). Well, now you too can learn this amazing ability in the comfort and privacy of your own home!! Introducing the revolutionary new Complete Procrastination Flowchart System (patent pending), specially formulated for daily use! All you have to do is follow these quick, easy steps and in just 12 hours a day you too can be transformed into a procrastinator*.

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Attack of the ‘eat penis’ person

|2 min

This semester, my students were creating a website which features a to-do list. Anyone who registers on the site can create their own to-do items which they can retrieve later. Unfortunately, some of the students hadn’t quite implemented authentication properly when their sites went live, and one of their classmates was a vandal with fellatio on their mind.

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People you find on the Internet

|8 min

Believe it or not, I signed up to online dating site OK Cupid just because I heard that they had very interesting and unique algorithms for matching people. Matches are calculated based on questions you answer, but there’s more to it than that. For any given question (e.g. Which is more important to you, true love or sex?), you choose a single answer, but you can also say which options you want a prospective partner to choose and how important that question is to you. So, for instance, I can specify that it is very important that they answer No to the question ‘Is God the most important thing in your life?’ This all works pretty well. Most of the guys suggested for me were actually pretty good matches.

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